Am I Okay?

Everyone is asked that on a daily bases or should be. This weekend, I was asked that very question, a few times, yet it made me evaluate my response.

My life, though not perfect (which I know is impossible), is nothing I dreamed. I live in a city I had no desire of being a resident of. Have a job I do not want to do for the rest of my life, though I'm pretty successful at it. I have a relationship with a man I love and care for so much, yet question some aspects of it. I have a bachelor's degree that remains useless for the time being. And dreams that are on hold or have become unrealistic. I guess it's being human to doubt life, and the hand dealt.

So am I okay? I guess so. I have come to terms, for awhile now, that is this where God wants me. As to why exactly, I'm still walking and finding out. I'm doing my best to move forward and not sulk in the past, though reminiscing is something I surely enjoy.

So what was the point of this blog post. Nothing, just my random thoughts and current feelings needing expressed. I needed an outlet and the internet is just that, when used wisely.

I have loved and lost, succeeded and failed, been hurt and caused pain. It's life, and I know I'm not the only one that experienced this, nor are they things I never will again. I grow, age, and become a better person because of these things. So am I really okay?

Yes, simply because I just need to look and cry out to God and know He's in control. I think when I am not "okay" is when I have tried to rely on myself or others. It's part of being human, but as I walk more with Him, I will continue to reminders He has it all under control, and that I'm okay.

I Ran

I finally got to a breaking point, put my shoes on and went out for a run with Windex. I wish she's didn't have to be on a leash, as it made it hard to get for range of motion of my arm, but well worth it. Only did maybe ten minutes, wore her out, and we walked for another five. Even bummed into Jason and Gracie (our other dog), on the way home. I definitely feel good!

Tonight, I got a great reminder of how awesome my family is. I am truly thankful for each and every one of them.

I am a horrible communicator. I have a computer and an iPhone, so more than enough resources to keep in contact, right? Yet, I rarely call my parents and siblings, simply because I have decided I'm too busy.

I need to be a better family member,  no matter my title to whoever it is or their relation to me.

Vacation Wanted

More like needed... But when and where to?

I have been working since October 5th with no real vacation, cause sick days and office holidays aren't really times to get away. I love my job and co-workers, but I have been doing the same "tasks" since December and need a change. After our migration into the new system, which is suppose to go live in three weeks, the light at the end of the tunnel will be a bit brighter. My tasks will change every two weeks or so, and I will no longer have to constantly say "I don't know, I haven't learned that yet."

I will most likely try to escape sometime in the fall/winter, since I'll have banked in enough vacation time to truly take a trip, but also, it will be the start of the off season. But where to go...

To Dream a Dream

Usually mine crash and burn due to lack or research or support.