Who knew I could do it to myself?

I've had my fair share of bumps, bruises, cuts and scars, but who knew that I could give myself a black eye. No, I didn't just punch myself, and I didn't do this on purpose. But boy does it hurt. I think I've only had one black eye in my life, and that was given by my brother Sam back in 2000. You can barley tell, minus the cut, that I even have a black eye, so I'm not worried.

Every time I plan and travel home, my excitement grows and grows. Like a flower, blooming with joy and life. What usually happens is that I have a conflict, or some how get upset and angry to the point that I want to leave...But now I grow excited to be done with my Bachelor's, in hopes of having more opportunities to see my family. I realize that's somewhat fairy tale like, but I'm not sure I want to plant my roots back in Long Beach; or California at that. Yes, next semester I will only have classes on Tuesdays and Thursdays, so more time in the studio of course, but more time to spend away as well.

With the realization of Rhonda and Brian's wedding only being in 14 weeks, I'm starting to feel not ready. I haven't seen the dress physically, thus I haven't even tried it on. Plus I had high hopes for my "girlish figure" prior to my fitting/purchase of this so called garment. I'm not calling myself fat, and I don't have low self-esteem issue when it comes to my weight. Yeah yeah, I was 145 my senior year, but I was running, lifting(not very much), and competing, so I was pretty lean in my days of old. Yes, I've gained a few pounds, quite a few, but I'm still beautiful, and that will never change. But I can change my physical health, which would help those extras to go away...but in due time.

Last night was church's Christmas Choir Special. I've never seen the parking lot that full before, but then again I'm only at Church when I'm back in the hood. It was a great performance, the music was awesome, and they sang one of my favorite songs, "Isn't He." David Justice need to bring it down an octave though...

Well I'm off to start my day, though Windex kinda started it for me...