I never thought I would have spend my Sunday afternoon slinging clay. I shot two rifles and a hand gun...Really felt like a cowgirl when Mark let me fire off his Winchester. I have the bruise to prove it, and I'm gonna wear it with honor come tomorrow. I really enjoyed shooting Beau's auto, and did pretty well with it. But I mostly enjoyed throwing the discs, and I'm a natural. I should really go take some pain killers...I think I just made my bad shoulder worse. But it felt good to be called by my Groundie name again. I love Seth and Waylon!
So I didn't venture out to this morning, mostly cause I had a late night. Went to the usual place with the usual people, and some I haven't seen in over two months. It was nice knowing I still don't have to show my ID to Uptown, and I rarely go there! But it did make me realize why I'm in Flagstaff, and that I'm not as lonely as I thought I was. Plus, who knew that you could lose five pounds dancing at Collins?
A lot of pondering and talkin' to people this weekend, just has caused me to question a lot of things in my life. Like why do I try to hold on to people that obviously don't want me? Doesn't mean I'm not good enough, or worthy of their presence, just not of their interest at this moment. Sucks for them, cause I'm pretty amazing to have around. Also, why do I allow myself to be taken on the same ride time and time again with most of the boys I date? Why give them the chance when I already know it will lead to disappointment? I shouldn't have to go through things like that in order to grow.
Lately I've been saying to people I need a boyfriend, kinda in a joking matter, but holding some truth. I don't need someone, but it would be nice. I haven't had a "boyfriend" since January, and honestly I've been happy without one, which is a shock. Technically, I have been talking to someone during that time, but it's just talking and wishing it seems. It would be nice to go out on a date, hold someone else's hand, and maybe get a kiss or two. I miss that type of intimacy from someone who cares for me.
Why does it seem like everyone and their mom is getting engaged and/or married? And I'm just even including my sister Rhonda in that, cause I'm being more from my age group. Lately I feel like I'm behind, but I shouldn't feel that way. So why do I?
1 comment:
Hey... I didn't know you had a blog! How are you? It's good talking to you again. It sounds like you're making your way pretty well in ...Flagstaff... is it? I miss cooking breakfast with ya in the morning. Bass Lake was such an amazing experience for me. Hey, don't fret the guys... they'll come around. In the meantime have fun and be yourself, that's all you could wish a guy could want you for. Enjoy life and stay in touch!
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