Today was pretty much as wasted day. Dwelling on the thought of seeing someone, and actually getting to talk to them, which I'm unsure of it even happening. So decided to work on something I've been neglecting since school started. Reading my Bible.
I have Holman's Christian Bible standard, and I love how it reads. It's actually sponsored by the Southern Baptist Convention, and is a easier to understand than the New King James and NIV versions out there. I grew up using King James up until my Mom gave me this one back when I moved out to Arizona. In the back of it, it has a section of "Where to Turn" questions. Such as, when you are lonely, feeling shame, sick, and even when it comes to God's purpose for you. It give you scripture to turn to. So I turned to Psalms 107, in relation to "when you are anxious for those you love." I didn't even get to the second verse. "Give thanks to the LORD, for He is good; His faithful love endures forever." I began to tear up, mostly because lately I've been feeling no one loves me, but here I've been selfish and blind. I tell myself and others that He is the only one that I can truly depend on for anything and everything, and I haven't been praising Him or even giving Him a thought in my daily tasks. I just need to allow myself to let go of this world, and prepare more for the next; and hopefully bring a few people with me.
"Did you eat today?" is now a sticky note on my keyboard, to remind me to endeavor in the food of God's Word. One cannot go hungry on His word, unless they refuse to eat. I'm done refusing, and making excuses not to sit down and enjoy this bounty.
So I've decided to take the route of getting my Master's in Fine Arts. Yes, it's more school, but it's an opportunity I feel driven towards. So where am I looking? So far, CSULB and CSUN, mostly cause I would like to move back home for a bit, and they both have great MFA programs. But I've also, for a long time, been looking into Portland State and Oregon. I'll pretty much go where ever the will give me an Internship, so that I don't have to pay as much tuition. After that, getting a job should be cake, since I'm a rare commodity.
For those you back home, I miss you all, and doing my best to be back sooner than Thanksgiving. Why? Cause I can!
2 comments:
All I have the energy to say is "Yeah!"
I love you Raylene. I know I don't tell you much and often I am not so great at showing you, but I do.I am excited to see what God is doing with you I know he has amazing plans.
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